Ciel's Softball Adventure
by reyrocks
Summary: Sebastian forces Ciel to sign up for a softball team against his own will. Will Ciel fail epicly? Or will he be the star player? Read to find out! Crack fic : I DON'T OWN KUROSHITSUJI!


**A/N: Hey guys! Here is the last Kuroshitsuji fanfiction I have written –sad face- I had a lot of fun writing this since I play softball and I did I right before my season started, which is long gone now! :3 I just never got to typing this since I had all my other stories to do. I may or may not write more Kuro crack stories in the future, it all depends on where my obsessions go or stay :D Ok, I'll stop talking now.**

**Please enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Kuroshitsuji or anything else (For the girls on their team, I used names from other animes, I don't own them either)**

Ciel's Softball Adventure

"Bocchan… Bocchan?" Sebastian said to his master, Ciel Phantomhive, who was lost in paperwork, feasting on a piece of cake.

"Huh? Did you say something?" Ciel said finally lifting his head.

"Bocchan, I am concerned about your health," his demon butler explained.

"Oh no, here we go again," muttered Ciel.

"I am concerned because lately you've had so much needless paperwork keeping you glued to this chair! And it doesn't help that you continuously eat sweets," Sebastian said.

"It's not like I have a choice, Sebastian. There's work that needs to be done," replied Ciel.

"Actually, there isn't. All the necessary work for this case is done, but you seem to be dragging it out. That's why you're going to join a sports team!" Sebastian said happily.

"What? Why? I'm not athletic!" Ciel complained.

"Because, Bocchan, you really don't get enough exercise, and with this case at a closing, you'll have some free time!"

"There is no way that's possible, Sebastian. The queen will just send me another," Ciel said.

"I can handle it!" Sebastian said.

"Yeah, but I don't wanna join a sport with other people! They be like, 'it's all about teamwork!' I HATE teamwork!" Ciel growled.

"Bocchan, almost every normal teenager is on a sports team," said Sebastian.

"But I'm not normal, I'm an Earl!" Ciel yelled.

"That doesn't make a difference!" Sebastian replied. "Now I've already taken the liberty of signing you up and-"

"WHAT?" Ciel shouted, "You just went ahead with it?"

"Yes, I did."

"You couldn't even let me choose?" Ciel was very frustrated.

"Well considering you're too short to play basketball and too scrawny to play football, I think softball was the most obvious choice," Sebastian said.

"WHAT? SOFTBALL? Are you SERIOUS? Softball is for GIRLS!" Ciel rose to his feet.

"I have many explanations for my choices, Bocchan," Sebastian said coolly.

"Couldn't you have at least picked baseball?" Ciel asked furiously.

"But Bocchan, with softball, it'll be easier to catch and hit since the ball is bigger. The pitches are under hand too, so you might hit it better. Plus, you'll probably be the best on the team since boys almost always out shine girls in sports. You know, almost always." Sebastian couldn't help but notice a look a satisfaction in Ciel's eye after he mentioned that. He obviously didn't hear the _almost_ part. "Also, Lady Elizabeth will be on your team."

Ciel almost burst into laughter. "Lizzie? Playing _sports_? HA! That's unheard of! She's to girly for sports!"

"Now Bocchan, don't let your fiancée hear that," Sebastian said.

Ciel sighed. "Is there no way out of this?"

"Nope."

"Fine." Ciel gave in.

"Good!" said a happy Sebastian. "Tomorrow, I will be escorting you and Lady Elizabeth to practice."

"And you're just telling me about this _now_?" Ciel complained.

"Yes, yes I am." He smiled.

"You are one nub of a butler," Ciel muttered.

"Actually I'm one _hell_ of a butl-"

"GET OUT!" Ciel ordered and shut the door on his butlers face.

Sebastian chuckled. "I can't wait to see you in action, Bocchan."

* * *

><p>The next day, Sebastian took Ciel and Lizzie to their first practice.<p>

"I can't wait Ciel!" Elizabeth cheered.

"Whatever, I could really care less," Ciel said darkly. Soon the carriage arrived at the fields.

"Ok, you two have fun, I'll come get you once practice has ended," Sebastian said.

"Ok!" said Lizzie. Sebastian rode away so Ciel and Lizzie were alone.

"Now what?" Ciel asked.

"Oh silly! We have to walk to the fields!" Lizzie replied.

"We actually have to _walk_ to them?" Ciel said surprised.

"Yeah, what did you expect?"

"I don't know." I only took them a few minutes of walking until they saw a field with girls sitting on a bench.

"Let's go tell them we're here Ciel!" Lizzie grabbed Ciel's arm and dragged him along. '_Oh geez,' _Ciel thought,_ 'this is gonna be a nightmare!'_

"Hey Ciel, let's greet the coach! Hiii!" she said.

"Hello there!~" said the coach.

"What the- UNDERTAKER? _You're_ the coach?" Ciel gasped.

"Eeehee, wow, the Earl on a girls' softball team! This is grand!" The Undertaker laughed.

"Don't you have a job or something?" Ciel asked.

"Hey, an Undertaker can take some time off you know. And it's always been my life-long dream to coach girls' softball! You know, other than being an undertaker!"

"Jesus Christ…" Ciel mumble to himself.

"Alright kiddies! Let's gather around and introduce ourselves!" The Undertaker called to all the girls. Soon all of them had gathered around. "Hello everyone! I'm your coach, and considering I can't remember my real name, you can all call me Coach Undertaker!"

"Hi Coach Undertaker!" all the girls said.

'_Is this kindergarten or something?'_ Ciel thought.

"Now we're going to go around say our names. Let's start with you!" The Undertaker pointed at Lizzie.

"Hi! I'm Lizzie!" she said.

"Hi Lizzie!" everyone, but Ciel, said.

Lizzie shoved Ciel. "You're next!" she whispered.

"Huh? Oh, um, I'm Ciel," he said.

"KYAAAA! There's a boy on our team!"

"He's so cute!"

"EEEP!"

All the girls loved the fact that there was a guy on their team, which confused Ciel. '_Whatever,'_ he thought.

"Ok everyone, we all know the earl is undeniably irresistible but-"

"He's an EARL?"

"Wait, is he _the_ Earl, Ciel Phantomhive?"

"That's amazing!"

"The Earl on _our_ team!"

"Nice going, Undertaker," Ciel muttered.

"Ok, let's finish up the introductions!" The Undertaker said. They learned that the other girls' names were Sakura, Kotori, Yomi, Alice, Yuki, Hinata, and Hotaru. All of them were already been in love with Ciel.

"Hmm, there's supposed to be ten of you but only nine are here…"

"Sorry I'm late!~" The tenth person had arrived.

"Oh. My. God. Tell me this isn't happening," Ciel said. The tenth member of their team was Alois Trancy!

"Hi everyone! I'm Alois! Please treat me nicely!~" he squealed.

"OMG another guy!"

"He's cute too!~"

"This is sooo amazing!"

"Well, I'm out!" Ciel declared and started to walk away.

"Ciel! Don't leave us!" The girl's cried.

"I can_not_ be on a team with that blonde kid!" he said.

"Now, now, I'm sure we can all be friends!" the Undertaker encouraged.

"Oh, Ciel's already my _best_ friend!" Alois cheered.

"LIAR!" Ciel retorted.

"Well, we'll all be the best of friends by the end of the season, so let's warm-up! Everyone pick a partner to practice catching and throwing with." Immediately, all the girls begged to be partners with Ciel, thus he was still the most popular among the team.

"It's only fair that guys should throw together," Alois said. "We wouldn't want to hurt any of you pretty girls!~"

"KYAAA!" the girls screamed. So Alois dragged Ciel against his own will out to their spot on the field. Ciel cursed and spat at him the whole time he was being brought there.

"My, my Ciel, you have a colorful vocabulary!" Alois said.

"YOU MIND YOUR-!"

"Now, now Earl, that's not how we speak to our teammates!" the Undertaker scolded.

"What? Undertaker that's so-"

"That's _Coach_ Undertaker to you!" he said and went off to help some of the other girls.

"Ok Ciel! Go stand over there so we can play catch!" said Alois.

"Play catch my-"

"EARL!" the Undertaker said.

"Stop calling me that!" Ciel yelled furiously.

"Why?"

"Because you're going to plant that in peoples' heads! My name is Ciel! Say it! CI-EL!" He tried to make it very clear.

"Ci-earl."

Fail.

"Close enough," Ciel sighed.

"Ok Ciel! Are you ready?" Alois called from his spot.

"Yeah, whatever."

Alois threw the ball. Ciel didn't realize how difficult it would be, so when he tried to catch it, the ball hit him in the head. "You're supposed to catch it Ciel!" Alois said

"I made the freakin' effort, so what does it matter?" Ciel mumbled so Alois wouldn't hear.

"Ok, now throw it back!" When Ciel tried to throw it, it went short and wide. "Good try!" Alois continued to cheer him on. Since it was the first practice, the Undertaker had them do this drill for a half hour. The entire time Ciel sucked. Badly. By the end of the drill, Ciel had finally gotten to the point where he could defend himself from being hit by the ball, but never once actually caught it.

"Good work team!" said the Undertaker. "Everyone go sit on the bench and cool off for a few minutes." On the bench, everyone wanted to sit next to Ciel. He was starting to feel claustrophobic.

"It's not cooling off if you're all trying to sit on me!" Ciel shouted. After the few minutes were up, the Undertaker said:

"Alright! Now let's do some batting practice! You're first Earl!"

"Eh?"

"What? I thought his name was Ciel!" said one of the girls.

"See what you're doing!" Ciel screamed at the Undertaker. He angrily grabbed a helmet and a bat as the Undertaker put everyone out on the field. _'Now what, do I just… swing? Yeah, I guess,'_ Ciel thought.

"Ok, you can come over now!" the Undertaker called to him.

"EEEEP! He's so adorable in that helmet!"

"KAWAII!"

"I wanna marry him!~" The girls squealed.

"STAY AWAY FROM MY FIANCÉE!" Lizzie demanded as the girls pouted.

Ciel sighed as he stepped into the batter's box.

"Ok Earl, just try to hit it without going outside of the box," the Undertaker instructed. He pitched the ball and Ciel completely missed. They spent twenty minutes until Ciel finally got a piece of the ball. He'd hit it a little past third base.

"Hey, I did it!" he said surprised.

"YAY CIEL!" the girls and Alois cheered.

"Yeah, too bad it was foul," said the Undertaker.

"Eh?"

"It was outside of the line, so it doesn't count."

"DANG IT! CURSES!" Ciel screamed at the sky.

"It's ok Earl, that's what practice is for! But for now, we've gotta move on so you're next Yomi!" For the rest of practice everyone tried hitting. They weren't much better than Ciel, but they were still better. "Ok everyone! See you at the next practice!" The Undertaker dismissed them.

"OK!" Everyone said.

"Come on Ciel! Let's go find Sebastian!" Lizzie said, grabbing ahold of his hand. Ciel followed, eager to get home to a piece of cake. Soon they found Sebastian.

"How was practice?" he asked.

"Great!" Lizzie replied cheerfully.

"Good." Sebastian noticed that Ciel hadn't said anything. He knew he was gonna get it when they returned to their mansion. So Sebastian drove them home, only stopping to drop Lizzie off at her mansion. When they got home, Sebastian said: "You haven't said a word, Bocchan."

"Well screw that! Screw _you!_" Ciel yelled at the top of his lungs. "I don't need this, all I need is work! Exercise of the mind! What's better than sitting at home doing work with a cup of tea? Not a sports team I can tell you that!"

"Well now Bocchan," Sebastian said after a long pause, "If you're done with your meaningless rant, I will go prepare you a snack and tea." Sebastian began to walk away.

"Hey! Get back here! I'm not finished with you!" Ciel shouted.

"I'm sorry, Bocchan, but the tea will get cold," the butler said and shut the door.

"SEBASTIAN!"

* * *

><p>Several practices later, Ciel still sucked at softball. He had tried every motive he could think of to get out of going to practice. First, he tried hiding, which failed because his demon butler was very capable of finding him. Then he tried falling asleep before practice so maybe Sebastian would leave him alone. That didn't happen; instead he got a bucket of ice water poured on his head. Then lastly, he tried just not going to the fields. He had Sebastian drop him off and he headed for the playground so he could hide in the slide. Of course, one of his 'fan girls' ended up finding him and had to drag him back to the fields. So now he had finally given up and just dealt with it. He hated it, but he did it. Everyone else had improved, but not him. He still sucked at throw, catching, running, you name it.<p>

At the next practice, the Undertaker announced: "Alright friends, gather around! Tomorrow will be our first game!" Everyone cheered except Ciel. "It'll be a home game so we'll play on this field. We'll be fielding first. Our positions will be: catcher, Hotaru, pitcher, Yuki, first base, Alice, second base, Yomi, shortstop, Sakura, third base, Kotori, left field, Alois, center field, Earl-"

"CIEL!"

"Whatever, and right field, Lizzie. OK! Let's all be ready for tomorrow's game. I have your uniforms here for you all so wait around to get yours!" At the end of practice, the Undertaker handed them out.

"What's our team name?" Alois asked.

"Oh yeah! Almost forgot, our team name is the London Unicorns!"

Ciel almost dropped dead. "WHAT?"

"Aww, that's a cute name!~" Lizzie squealed.

"Oh my God, I'M GONNA DIE!" AHHHHH!" Ciel fell on the ground gasping for air.

"Ah, I forgot the Earl is afraid of unicorns," the Undertaker said. "Ah well, too late to change names now!"

"WHAT? YOU _HAVE_ TO CHANGE IT! I'M GONNA DIIIIIEEE!" Ciel screamed in agony.

"Well the uniforms already have the name printed on them-"

"EH? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO MEEEEE?" Ciel cried.

"Don't worry Earl! There won't be any unicorns on the field." The Undertaker winked.

"B-But-!"

"No 'buts' Cielly-chan!" Alois giggled. Now Ciel was feeling destructive as well as fearful. This was one of the only situations in his life where he wanted to cry.

"It's ok Ciel!"

"We'll protect you!" The girls tried to comfort him.

"STAY AWAY FROM MY FIANCÉE! I CAN COMFORT HIM MYSELF!" Lizzie snapped.

"Kyaaaa!" The girls all scattered.

Soon they went back to where Sebastian dropped them off and headed home as soon as he got there. Back at the mansion, Sebastian was serving Ciel tea and asked:

"Are you excited for your first game tomorrow, Bocchan?"

"Yeah, I'm soooo thrilled," he replied dryly.

"Now what did I say about being sarcastic, Bocchan?" Sebastian teased.

"Shut up! I don't care! I know I'm gonna die tomorrow because our team name in the Unicorns!" Sebastian burst into laughter, which normally he would hold in, but this time it was just too funny.

"Really Bocchan? _Really?_" Sebastian said as he continued to laugh.

"Will you just _shut up!_" Ciel demanded.

"Hehe… whatever you say, my Lord," he said in a mocking tone. This angered Ciel, so he took the plate sitting on his desk and threw it at Sebastian's head. He ducked and it smashed behind him on the door. "Oh dear, it looks like you're in a mood, Bocchan, so I'll just leave you now." Sebastian got up and left with a grin. Ciel angrily got ready for bed on his own and threw himself under the covers.

"I'll just not wake up," he whispered. "I'll never wake…" He drifted off to sleep.

* * *

><p>"Rise and shine, Bocchan!" Sebastian opened the curtains letting in a bright light to awaken his master.<p>

"Nyaa-? Wha- IT'S EIGHT O'CLOCK!" Ciel yelled.

"I know, but your game starts and ten."

"Who plays sports at that hour?" Ciel asked.

"Normal people maybe?"

"Whatever," Ciel sighed.

"Here, I'll let you change into your uniform while I finish breakfast," Sebastian said.

"Fine." Ciel took the uniform out of the bag for the first time. "Wha- why is it PINK?" he shouted. He ran downstairs to the kitchen, still in his sleepwear. "Sebastian, I am _not_ wearing this!"

"But Bocchan, you have to. The Undertaker really _does_ like pink," Sebastian said.

"Are you kidding me?"

"No."

T_T

"Whatever." Ciel stopped back upstairs to change. He shuttered at the sight of 'The London Unicorn' printed on the front. When he came back downstairs in his uniform, Sebastian said:

"Awww, you're so cute Bocchan!" he teased.

"Stop."

"Lemme get a picture!"

"Shut up!" Ciel demanded.

"Ok, ok, eat and let's go." So Ciel ate his breakfast slowly to avoid getting there on time. After they picked up Lizzie, Sebastian took them to the fields. "Ok, I want a picture of you two!" Sebastian said taking out his camera.

"Wha-?"

"YAY!" Lizzie grabbed Ciel and pulled him into the shot.

The camera snapped. "Aww, how adorable!~" Sebastian laughed.

"Come on, let's just go," Ciel said in a low, menacing tone.

"I'll be cheering for you!" He smiled.

"What? You're staying?"

"Well duh," he replied pulling out a lawn chair. "I wanna see you do your thing!"

"I'm screwed," Ciel mumbled. "And stop trying to be cool!" he yelled back at him. Ciel and Lizzie headed to the field where their team was.

"Hi Ciel!" Alois said when they got there, "You look cute today!" All the girls agreed with their squeals.

"Well you're ugly," he mumbled under his breath.

"What?"

"Nothing." Alois let it slide. When the Undertaker got there, he said:

"Alright people! I know we can do it, so let's do it Unicorns!"

"Yeah!"

"AHHH!" Ciel almost had a heart attack.

"Everyone take your positions!" Everyone ran out to their spots. While the pitcher warmed up, the others threw the ball to each other for practice. When Alois caught it from Lizzie, he was supposed to throw it to Ciel, but instead he ran it over to him.

"Trancy, your arm can't be that weak you can't throw the ball," he smirked.

"But if I throw it you won't catch it!" Alois said.

"Shut up," Ciel mumbled.

"Balls in!" the umpire called. Ciel saw Alois had a dirty grin on his face. '_Woooow, he would,'_ Ciel thought. Once the balls had been thrown in, Yuki pitched the ball and it connected with the bat almost instantly. The ball flew straight over Ciel's head as he watched it fly by.

"Come on Earl! Chase the ball!" the Undertaker called from the bench.

"Huh? Was I supposed to get than?" Ciel asked, not paying attention to the game at all.

"Go, Ciel, go!" the girls cheered. Ciel sighed and ran after the ball. He got it and barely threw it to the cutoff, who threw it to third base, where they stopped the runner. "YAY CIEL!" they all cheered, even though Ciel screwed up.

"Imbeciles…" Ciel muttered.

Finally the inning had ended; the other team had five points now.

"Ok everyone!" the Undertaker said when all of them had returned to the bench, "Now's our chance to get back our points!"

"Yeah!" They cheered.

"Earl! You're up first!"

"Say what now?" Ciel complained.

"Go get 'em, Bocchan!" Sebastian cheered from the side lines.

"Tch." Ciel grabbed a bat and went out to the plate. The other team's pitcher pitched the ball way off the target area, but Ciel swung anyway.

"Strike one!"

"Crud…"

"Come on Ciel!" His teammates cheered. Another pitch came and he missed again.

"Strike two!"

"I'm screwed." The ball came again.

"Ciel! The ball is a unicorn!" Alois screamed.

"WHAT?" Ciel's bat swung around so hard, it hit the ball with full force sending it flying far out in the outfield. No one had to tell Ciel to run; he was running around the bases at full speed screaming: "AAHHHHHH! THEY'RE GONNA EAT MEEE!" In no time at all, Ciel ran over home plate, scoring a homerun for the team. The crowd roared for Ciel's victory, who was spazzing out on the ground.

"You did it Earl!" cheered the Undertaker.

"Evil… unicorns…" Ciel mumbled as he was carried back to the bench.

Soon came the last inning. The other team was ahead, eleven to three. Odds were, they were going to lose. But no one gave up. Ciel was standing in the outfield again. The same batter that hit the ball past him was up to bat again. Ciel didn't pay any more attention this time than the last. The girl hit the ball right to Ciel, who was busy thinking about work rather than the oncoming ball which hit him straight in the noggin.

"AH!" Ciel fell over. Ironically, the ball landed straight into his glove, making the third out.

"Hurray Ciel!" the girls squealed.

"Oh geez." They all ran off the field, Ciel with a big bruise on his head.

"Way to go Earl!" said the Undertaker.

"Yeah, yeah." Unfortunately, they didn't score any runs, so they lost the game. Afterwards, the Undertaker made an announcement.

"Splendid job today my children!" he said, "And special congrats to our star player, the Earl!"

"YAAAY!" they cheered. Ciel just sat there with a bored expression. All the players headed off to find their parents, and Ciel and Lizzie went to Sebastian.

"Good job Bocchan! And you too, Lady Elizabeth!" Sebastian said.

"Thanks Sebastian!" Lizzie beamed.

"Whatever," Ciel mumbled. After Sebastian dropped Lizzie off, he took them home for a hot cup of tea.

"You did very well today, Bocchan," he butler said.

"Just leave me alone, I'm going back to sleep." Ciel headed for his room.

"But Bocchan, there's work to be done and you're very behind schedule!"

"Wh-WHAT?" Ciel fumed. "If it wasn't for this sports crap I'd be able to get it done! You told me you'd handle it!"

"Did I say that? I don't recall," Sebastian started to walk away.

"Hey! I demand you come back her you-" The door shut.

"And that's how it's done," Sebastian said to himself and went to complete his duties.

.:FIN:.

**Please review! :D Hope you enjoyed it!**


End file.
